


F is for "First"

by Bad_Egg



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Loss of Parent(s), References to Depression, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 09:23:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10694112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bad_Egg/pseuds/Bad_Egg
Summary: Simon never expected to find anything or anyone of importance in the post apocalyptic wasteland he now called home. Until he realised she had been right in front of him the whole time.





	F is for "First"

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the Simon ABC writing challenge and I hope you enjoy this fluffy-angsty little one-shot.

Death was everywhere.

From the stench of it clinging to every worn fibre, to the sight of it shuffling in ravenous hordes outside of the compound. He couldn’t remember when it happened, but he’d become numb to it. In the New World Order, people were a currency of trade. Building blocks to create a strong workforce and an even stronger army. They were assets. The grief that he should have felt when they lost another Savior had vanished along the way and he never considered it would be possible to feel it again.

But then she happened.

It was hard to believe anyone so pure of heart could have survived as long as she had, doting on her aging father and working twice as hard when he couldn’t. Even when Negan had offered her the world in exchange for her devotion, she’d refused to submit. Simon had often caught glimpses of her fetching food and water, or frequenting the various stalls, trading points for anything that might make her old man more comfortable. But he never once saw her allow herself any luxuries.

The first time he spoke to her, she’d jumped at the sound of his voice and dropped the small pile of postcards she had been admiring. He’d leant down to pick them up, but by the time he’d returned to stand, she’d gone. Looking down at the postcards in his hands, he’d noted the images of fine art pieces and the small text on the back read the name of one of the art galleries in Atlanta.

They had been his first gift to her. Contained in a plain brown envelope with the simple words Sorry I startled you scrawled across the front. He’d slipped it through the small gap under her door that same evening and hoped she might find some comfort in them.

The first time she spoke to him, she had questioned why. He was so mesmerised by her voice that he’d had to ask her to repeat the question, but he made sure to listen intently the second time around. The answer he gave was returned with distrust and she immediately tried to hand them back to him, stating she couldn’t afford to lose points on something so trivial. But he pushed them back and asked why she’d found it hard to believe that someone could do something kind without wanting anything in return. She didn’t have an answer. Instead she’d hesitantly given her thanks, clutched the envelope tight and meekly walked away.

The first time he’d felt the touch of her hand, it had been to stop him from leaving. He’d found her outside, staring up at the night sky, the tears flowing freely and silently down her cheeks. Her father had been taken ill and it was unlikely he would recover. He was her everything, she had told him, and she didn’t know how long he would live. Simon thought she might want to be left alone, but when she reached out and asked him to stay, he didn’t hesitate to oblige. He slipped his jacket off, wrapped it around her shoulders and held her to his chest as she cried.

Since that night, they’d found themselves spending more and more time in each other’s company. Instead of accidental encounters, they now actively sought each other out. Sometimes to eat together, sometimes to laugh together and sometimes just to enjoy moments of comfortable silence. Allowing themselves a small respite from the daily bustle of the compound.

The first time he’d met her father, he was returning from the marketplace with bottles of fresh water and medication, that he was sure they’d be grateful for. She had invited him into the small room she shared with her dad. He was bedridden and tucked up cosily and Simon noticed a small mattress covered by an even smaller blanket pressed against the wall in the corner. That must have been where she slept, he had thought. Her father had beckoned Simon over and took his hand in his own, shaking it as hard as he could manage. He thanked him for the happiness he had brought back to his daughter’s life, however small. That had been the first time he’d seen her blush and he couldn’t help but laugh and assure them both that he would try his best to keep up the good work.

And he did. He would visit them often and sometimes would even stop by just to check how her father was doing while she carried out her daily duties. Slowly, but surely, he was starting to remember what it felt like to have family. To be part of something intimate and real.

The first time she had knocked on Simon’s door, he was surprised to see her standing there. She had never ventured to that part of the compound before, having previously confessed she didn’t like to risk running into any of the other high-ranking Saviors. He’d invited her in and as the door clicked shut, she had reached up on her tip toes to press her lips softly against his.

That was the first time they spent the night together.

But that first night turned into many more, as they began to crave each other’s touch with every passing day. Whenever they were apart, he missed the warmth of her body against his, his hand felt empty without hers to hold and the scent of her, that lingered on his clothing, would captivate his thoughts.

But death was everywhere and they’d been foolish enough to become so distracted by their dalliances, that they had forgotten how quickly things could change for the worse and it wasn’t long before the inevitable happened.

Her father was gone.

Simon now stood, ashen-faced in front of her door. All he could concentrate on were the weeps and sobs that were coming from inside the room. She was heartbroken and he knew she wouldn’t be able to do what needed to be done, which was why he had left swiftly to retrieved his knife, that was now tucked securely into his belt. His hand gripped the handle tightly and he finally pushed his way inside.

“You want to step outside?” He asked, removing the knife from it’s sheath. They didn’t know how long he’d been dead for and that meant he was a ticking time bomb just waiting to turn.

She brought her fathers cold hand to her lips and kissed it hard before stepping away towards the small table on the other side of the room. She sat herself down and made sure to avoid looking back in the direction of the body.

“Just make it quick.” She said.

Simon didn’t waste any time, holding her father’s head firmly, he plunged the knife deep into his temple, preventing him from waking up again and wreaking havoc in the compound.

Simon wanted to speak, he wanted to say something to ease the despair that shook her to her very core, but not a single word came out. In her grief, she hadn’t noticed his approach and he gently placed his hand upon her shoulder to let her know he was there.

“Simon?” She whispered, between sobs.

“I’m here.” He said, his voice breaking slightly.

“It’s got your name on it.” She turned to look at him and he noticed a brown envelope in her hands. It was the same envelope he’d given to her weeks ago that had originally contained the postcards. Only now, it lacked the previous bulge and his name had been written across it in large lettering.

Taking it, he reached inside and pulled out a large folded piece of paper and began to read.

_“Simon,_

_It’s no secret that I’m dyin and I feel like my time ain’t gonna last too long now. But I need you to know this before I go. I don’t know if she told you about her ma, but we lost her right before we came here. We’d made it as a family for so long, but wrong place, wrong time and bam, that was it, my wife was gone and my girl watched it happen. And ya know what? My girl disappeared too. She was here, sure. But she was an echo of what she used to be and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it._

_Worst part was, I knew I was sick. But after everythin, I couldn’t bring myself to tell her. Dumb, I know. But I never was great at keepin secrets, so, she figured it out on her own eventually. I thought that was it. Like she was gonna do something dumb. But she didn’t and, well, I guess what I’m trying to say is…I think you might have just saved her._  
She started smiling again, ya know. Really smiling. Not just them ones she’d do to make out she was alright, but real happy ones. I think you did that.  
The first time I saw you together, I knew. She looked at you in a way I ain’t ever seen her look at someone and I thought to myself, this fella right here brought her back to me. 

_She means the world to me, Simon. She’s been my world since I first saw her, since I first held her and since I was the first man to ever love her. But I gotta leave my world behind now. I gotta give that world to you. Because I know you love her just as much as I do and you’re the only man left on earth that I would trust with my girl._

_So you do right by her and don’t you ever let her go, Simon. I’m beggin ya. Don’t you let her go._

_PA x”_

The ink on the page smudged as the single droplet of water splashed against the paper. It was then that Simon realised he was crying. She stood up to wipe his tears away, but he interrupted her by pressing his lips firmly against hers as he embraced the woman he vowed to call his own for as long as they both lived.

He didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but as they broke away, he reached up to stroke the delicate skin of her cheek. When he eventually spoke, she looked at him quizzically, all wide eyed and speechless until a small smile appeared to tug at the corner of her lips and it suddenly dawned on him…

That was the first time he told her he loved her.


End file.
